White Wine

Haaaaayyyy....

Just imagine…

Coordinating 3 weddings- meeting with couples, designing an invitation with lots of revisions, consulting with other coordinators, texting suppliers and wedding guests, running around churches and reception venues in kitty heels, really really bad wedding weather

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Organizing a youth concert- more meetings with the organizing team, following up students and teachers, getting talents from different schools, haggling with performers with schedules on the same day, raising funds from zero to 40thou, securing concert and practice venues, texting non-stop, emailing non-stop, debating with co-teachers, appeasing troubled students, revising and designing tickets, banners, posters and backdrops, distributing tasks, checking up on team effort, closing deals with suppliers AND having to deal with more high school gossips

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Managing a business- cleaning & manning the office, arranging office schedules, accounting business funds, conceptualizing and design marketing materials, printing and distributing flyers, conceptualizing client proposals, closing client deals, finishing job orders, reviewing photos and designs, going to client calls, setting up photo shoot schedules, commuting around the metro

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Keeping an apartment- doing household chores like sweeping the floor, cleaning the bedroom and bathroom, paying the bills, paying the rent, doing laundry, cooking food, checking up on and dinner with family and friends

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Joining a community- practicing for group commitments, attending household meetings

=

4-5 hours of sleep for 2 straight weeks and 5minutes crying in a cab just to let off steam.  Haaaaaayyyyy!!!!! L

God is a HAPPY God

When searching for the meaning of HAPPINESS, this is what I got from Dictionary.com: "pleasure, joy, exhilaration, bliss, contentedness, delight, enjoyment, satisfaction. Happiness, bliss, contentment, felicity imply an active or passive state of pleasure or pleasurable satisfaction. Happiness results from the possession or attainment of what one considers good: the happiness of visiting one's family."

I found it funny that I came across that sentence as an example.  God and I have been so close these days and I have been extra attentive in all His whispers to me lately.  He is a happy God and everything He tells me, shows me and blesses me never fails to make me smile.  He has been blessing me with a special mission these days and I am completely overwhelmed by the tasks that He has entrusted me to do.  Naturally I have little time for my family now.  But I look forward to every weekend when we I come home and bond with them.  But of course each of us has different paths during the week and we may not always have a happy ending every weekend.  Still I know that seeing familiar faces, whether smiling or not, is enough reward for me from the busy days that had just past.  These days, weekends have been extra challenging for me.  It’s hard when people you really love are hurting and chooses to shun you out of their network of confidants.  And no matter how much you reach out, they continue building their wall of silence.  Is it pride or hatred? I don't really know.  But God guides me in every way and He once again tells me to continue being happy.  I should be happy that at least my family is still complete every single weekend that I'm home.  I know also that this is just a test that I have to overcome.  All I have to do is be strong, have faith that God is working things with each member of my family and whatever it is that they are experiencing, they just need extra understanding.  I can never force them to love me or talk to me or accept me.  All I can really do is love them even more and pray harder for their healing or cause. 

Last week, my partner and I were visited by a bishop who wanted to have his portrait taken by us.  We gave him our full package and he was overwhelmed with our work.  He loved our pictures, loved our studio and was impressed at our SMILE sessions.  He affirmed us in so many words that we will be a big blessing to the community of Christ wherever we are.  But of course all of these may seem like boasting.  What struck me most about his visit was that he blessed us right before he left.  And the words that we received from his blessings were exactly what Heidi and I were both praying for.  Our studio opening is nearing and so much work has to been done before that.  And instead of being stressed out by it, we choose to be happy with the fact that God believes in us so much to bless us with this huge responsibility.  I realized also that when you are being used by Him, more forces will come to oppress you.  And surprisingly, people closest to you are targeted most of the time.  That’s why every prayer time I always get strong faith, trust and unconditional love as messages from Him.  God wants me to trust in Him, have faith and love those being used to oppress me.  Right now, I only think of them as blessings…who test my faith and help me become a stronger Christian.  I remember a quote from one of our conversations with a client at our studio.  He quoted, “you only get Happiness when you stop looking for it and become contented with what God is blessing you at the moment.”  How true! 

Wonders of all wonders

God has been affirming me day in and day out of all the choices I've made in all aspects of my life these days...right now I can truly say that I am happy again and I am optimistic about my plans for my future now.   Right now I am at peace.

How sad lang na I cannot completely share much of it to everybody.  Not everybody will see my change, not everybody will accept my choices and not everybody will believe my plans.  But I know one thing important, that God does.  And no matter how painful it is to know that my transformation, my choices and my changes may not appeal to people (more importantly, to people whom I dearly love) I know that God will take good care of them and I will never stop praying for and loving them despite these.

GUARANTEED PROMISE!

And I will establish for them, as an eternal covenant that I will be their God, and they shall be my people; and I will not again remove my people

Israel

from the land I gave them.

Baruch 2: 35

It’s been a long time since I've felt being in-love with God again. And ever since I stepped into Singles for Christ back in 2000, I always prayed that He bless me with the exact same feeling that I've felt when I first fell in love with Him, during my youth camp way back 1995. But serving with new faces, committing to new ministries never really gave back that feeling of ecstasy, that hype, that spiritual highness that I first felt when started in Youth For Christ back in 1995.

Last weekend, during the SFC Metro Manila Conference in

Bataan

, God blessed me with that feeling! During the worships, I heard Strong and Faithful, Purify, Isaiah 43 and the other old songs that lifted me up so high before and I was amazed at how He never changed! He answered my prayers and He spoke to me using the exact same words that He used when I was still young.  HE WAS STILL THE SAME! I thought all these years that God was different. All the service, sacrifices and reflections I offered didn’t feel fulfilling enough to me. I felt that He was there for me, but I also felt that He wasn’t enough. But this weekend I realized that it was only me...and He never did change! I also bumped into a lot of other people whom I’ve served with during my YFC days. I had a chance to see my friends from YFC UP, had the time to talk with a brother and a sister from YFC LCCG, and I felt that all these people were God’s signs of affirmation, telling me once more that He will be (my God), and (I) shall be (His daughter); and (He) will not again remove (me) from Israel, from the land (that He) gave (me). And during the conference, He whispered that to me.  He brought me again to that exact same feeling of transfiguration during my youth camp before. And He is calling me once more to be His active instrument of faith and love. 

I know that God is not just affirming me that no matter how different our lives may be now, He will always be the same God. His promise for us then is still His promise for us now. No matter what path we choose in our lives, we can never escape His love. With every turn we make—whether good or bad—He will always turn us (and humble us) back to His loving arms.

Then they shall turn back from their stiff-necked stubbornness, and from their evil deeds, because they shall remember the fate of their fathers who sinned against the LORD. And I will bring them back to the land which with my oath I promised to their fathers, to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob; and they shall rule it. I will make them increase; they shall not then diminish.

Baruch 2: 33

Another beautiful surprise...this is LIFE!

God is really funny!

He's always been described as "the.... of all..." but seldom have I read that He was ever described as "funny".  Well, in my life He is!

Once when I was still in 6th grade I was so worried about losing my friends when I get accelerated in high school.  Most of my close friends were staying for the 7th grade kasi.  But suddenly I was pointed to someone and heard a whisper in my mind: "See that girl? I will bless your life with her presence". 

And so high school came and I was indeed blessed with her company.  Her name was Heidi and she became one of my closest friends then.  I was even more blessed when our friendship (along with Hazel, Rosette and

Cher

) moved on with our barkada more than ten years after we graduated.  College and work came and I kept hearing whispers during my prayer time and some of it were about Heidi.  A month ago I heard another whisper.  I had been looking to move on to a more permanent career since I left my previous employee.  I inquired on a lot of openings and received some invites as well, some in corporate, others in service and some abroad.  I kept an open mind in everything but no matter what I did, nothing felt comfortable for me.  It was as if I was being led towards something else but I just didn't know what.  In the meantime, I was helping out Heidi with her plans.  She was nurturing a growing idea that at first seemed like personal gains but eventually evolved into a mission.  And as I was contributing to hers, I felt like I was also slowly building mine.  Strangely enough, I felt so at home with her plans, and once more I heard another whisper.  It said, "This is what I told you more than ten years ago, I will bless your life with her presence.  Go on, and share your mission with hers". And before I knew it I realized that I was also working on mine along with hers!

God kept inspiring me to invite her in the community where I was active in ever since I was still in high school.  Sadly, my attempts a couple of times during college seemed like bad timing.  But when Heidi finally asked me to bring her to my chapter in SFC Makati last summer, I was ecstatic! And now, everything seemed to fall into place.  I feel so fulfilled to finally understand all of God's whispers.  He really is funny...He spoke through big miracles during the Old Testament, parables and teaching during the New Testament. But to me, He whispers.  He sends me sounds, music and secret thoughts that sometimes I ignore, I brush off or I never really tried to understand.  But He is a persistent God and He kept on whispering until I finally listened and understood.  Ever since Heidi and I started with our shared mission, my life has been more relaxed, more fulfilling and less stressful.  I know I am where I ought to be and I know Heidi is too.  Everything just fits like a glove.  I realized that I was too anxious about a lot of things in the past and though I had a relationship with God, I was still trying to control my life instead of letting His plans control me.  He nudged me, pinched me and surprised me a couple of times just so I’d keep my focus on Him.  But now I realized I never tried to understand Him.  Yes He is truly great, wise, merciful and all that, but now I know He’s funny and warm too.  His word in my LIFE is so comfortable and calm.  His miracles are amusing and uncomplicated. He is a funny God! And in this mission that He has blessed me with, I hope to be a living example of that.

A Story About Giving Up Boys For Lent

What do you give up for Lent? Ice cream? Soft drinks? Cigarettes? TV? Coffee? I personally gave up all my favorite chicken, beef and pork dishes.  For the whole Lenten season, I have been bound to eating fish and vegetables.  Its hard having to take off all the meat from all the meals I order.  But, speaking of sacrifice...
Here is a story about a unique Lenten sacrifice. Let's take a glimpse at a young woman's world, a snapshot of her generation, and how she treks her own path to holiness.

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MY LENTEN SACRIFICE
by Tina Matanguihan

Two years ago, I gave up boys for Lent.

My Lenten sacrifice usually revolves around meat, chocolates, watching TV and texting when I finally had a cellphone. But I've never really given up boys. For one thing, I'm not really boy-crazy, although I tend to get fixated on one of my "currents". Thoughts about this "current" may not be physically lustful, but they're distracting nonetheless.

So one Lent, I decided to give my "current" up.

But how did I come to my decision?

There was this guy I started liking a couple of months before 2004 ended. Truth be told, I really wasn't interested in him before, plus I just came from a really heartbreaking one-way relationship (by one-way
relationship, I mean: I like the guy, guy doesn't like me back, I hoped the guy liked me back SOMEHOW, but he never did in the first place. Oops, there goes a piece of my heart). I really didn't want to start liking anyone else; I just want to focus on God and my studies. Then I met this guy and my friends seem to think it was fun to tease me to him and before I knew it, I realized that I actually really like the guy.

Uh-oh....

But unlike the one before him, I was more careful this time. I didn't want the same thing to happen again, so I kept my distance. Yes, we're friends, but I was careful not to bring any meaning into this friendship. He was unbelievably nice, funny, cute...and what do you know, he used to want to be a priest! My "spiritual" eyes were seeing "Man of God!" in neon lights flashing all around him that I had unknowingly let my heart become attached to him. I still kept my distance, but I started seeing all his good characters and pray that if he doesn't end up with me, then just let him go back to his vocation (okay, that wasn't what I really thought then. What I really prayed was that I don't want to be an obstruction to God's plan for him. If He wants him to be a priest, then so be it. It would be okay for me, since he would be committing his life and be celibate for God, and there's no "competition. " Not the nicest thing to think I know.).

And what was the ultimate "dream date" I want to have with him? To go to mass. Yes, to attend and receive the Holy Eucharist with him. Sounds good enough, eh? Not your typical "date". This should work out now!

It was the week of Ash Wednesday, and I was praying to God about this "date". I asked Him if He would please let the guy go to Ash Wednesday mass with me, and I will really, really be happy. But I also invited him to a mass that was sponsored by our organization the day before. He told me he'd come, and I was really expecting him to be there only to be disappointed to know that he forgot. Man, was I crushed.

He made it up to me the next day, though. He was the first one to ask me what time the Ash Wednesday mass was and told me to wait for him because we'd go there together. He even stopped by our booth to remind me about it! Of course, I was all hidden giggles and kilig at that but I had to be in control lest I wanted him to know.

And so off to mass we went, together with another friend, and during the mass, I suddenly realized how God answered my first prayer, about us going to mass together on Ash Wednesday. That sure made me smile. Come Communion time, as soon as I received the Body of Christ, a still small voice spoke to my heart: "What would you sacrifice for Lent?"

As soon as I heard that, I looked at the guy praying beside me and then a mental conversation popped into my mind:

Me: No, Lord, you can't be asking me to...
God: I'm not saying anything.
Me: ...
Me: But Lord, why him? Why can't it be someone else? Something else? Chocolate? Internet...no, wait, I can't give that up, I need that for school. Texting? Lord? You know I've never felt this happy before and --
God: My dear daughter, I'm asking YOU what you will be giving up for Lent. I'm not asking you to give him up. It will be on your choice alone.
Me: But why do I feel like if I don't offer this one up, anything else offered wouldn't be pleasing You.
God: My princess, as long as it comes from your heart, I will be pleased. I am giving you the power to decide what to give up for Lent this year.

And so that was why I still ended up giving up the boy. It was hard. Not only because I liked the guy, but also because I really didn't know how I was supposed to give him up. Should I avoid him? Should I stop talking to him? Stop texting him? But what about our friendship? How am I really letting him go? What exactly am I giving up?

Looking back at that moment now, two years later, I smile and remember how I struggled to keep him on God's altar as my offering. I always wanted to steal him away from Him, to claim Him as my own, but God would always send me little reminders (that comes in the form of a little ache in the heart) that make me give the guy back to Him. It's not easy; I always thought of what if, what if...and it hurts to know the fact that even after Lent, I'd still have to continue giving him up.

But the real lesson I learned in this sacrifice is, it's not about killing your feelings for the guy. It's not about not talking to him, avoiding him or any of those things I mentioned in the previous paragraph. Although those things I mentioned can be part of the sacrifice, that isn't the point at all. It's acknowledging that you have these feelings but still choosing to look and focus on The One who can not only return the affections I have for the guy but give so much more. Let me stress that: SO MUCH MORE. It's accepting that you like the guy, but proclaiming and believing that you love God more than you like human. It's telling God, "Lord, I like him. I really, really do. But I love You more. So I will choose to love You even if it means I have to let this guy and my feelings for him go."

Judy McDonald of Lifeteen.com says: "Lent is not about giving things up and making those around miserable. Its about looking at your life and seeing what is keeping you from Jesus. This Lent I am looking at the marvel that is and honestly asking, what in my life is keeping me from getting closer to Jesus?" I'm not saying you should all give up your crushes or love lives this Lent, of course not. But if that guy or girl you really REALLY like is keeping you from focusing on God, then maybe it's time for you to stop, do a feelings check and re-focus yourself on Him at this particular season. And I'm sure by the end of this Lenten season, you'll see and feel things a lot differently. :)

Have a meaningful Lenten season. :) Be blessed!

Tina Matanguihan works for a telecom company testing its products and services. She is a member of Singles For Christ (SFC) and blogs at Refineme.org. She recently launched a new blog with her friends focusing on the lives of young women at Godchicks.refineme. org.

Looking for another girl roommate :)

Hi friends!

My room mate and I are looking for another girl to share our 43sq m, 1bedroom apartment at Cityland Shaw Tower.  It’s between Shangri La Mall and Lourdes/ St. Francis Church, 5min away from the MRT station, Megamall and UA&P.  We will be splitting the total rent of P13,000 between the three of us if ever. It’s inclusive of association dues and use of pool and gym. The room is fully furnished already…no need to spend for furniture, except for an extra bed space.

If you’re interested, OR YOU KNOW ANYONE WHO MIGHT...feel free to spread the word and reply thru this email ASAP!

Thanks!  

LOOK BACK BEFORE MOVING AHEAD

WOW! WHAT A YEAR!

After reading this, I decided to look back at the year that has just passed. I went thru all my BLOG entries in my Multiply Friendster sites. I made a lot of entries, talked to a lot of people and learned ALOT of lessons...whew! All the pains and the joys, the laughter and the tears...EVERYTHING! I love my family for all our misunderstandings and happy memories alike. I love my friends for all our disappointing and fulfilling interactions. I love all the places that God has brought me to and I will never regret all my encounters...young, old, rich, poor alike! Thank you everyone for the year that has passed! I wonder what's in store for all of us this coming 2007?

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Before you set your goals, resolve to assess your accomplishments

by A.K. Boyle
Published: 12/26/2006

As the New Year approaches, our minds turn to what lies ahead.  It's a time to set goals for the next 365 days, to challenge ourselves to adopt a better attitude, do away with bad habits and set ourselves back on the never-ending path to self improvement on the whole. But while New Year's resolutions should infuse us with hope and empowerment, all that self examination can draw our attention to our shortcomings and put uncomfortable emphasis on the goals we have not yet met. Before you set a plan for the future, take a hard look at the past.  Acknowledge all the goals you have achieved and the person you've become.  We could all stand to improve on ourselves -- it's an essential part of our humanity -- but don't lose sight of how far you've had to come to get where you are.

The questionnaire
Where were you a year ago?  Who has come into your life and enriched it? What are you most proud of?  Where were you 5 and 10 years ago and what has changed?  More importantly, how have you changed?  The questions are deceptively simple.  And "I haven't changed" is not an acceptable answer.  You have.  It's not possible to live life, to look and listen to the world around you and to take part in it, without letting it affect you.  Your job now is to take stock of what you've done and who you are and give yourself credit for what you've accomplished.

Life moves quickly.  Even when daily life is at a crawl, the passage of time can take you unaware.  And we don't see even huge changes, maybe especially huge changes, when we're in the midst of them. It's up to your later self to look back and acknowledge progress.

Success in hiding
Challenges can look a lot like setbacks, and can even disguise themselves as regrets. Don't be fooled.  Even our greatest trials and grandest failures can spotlight hidden strengths.  Say you've taken a pay cut or put on a few pounds.  That doesn't mean there's no cause for commendation.  If you're supporting yourself despite a career change or tremendous responsibility, if you're making efforts for your health when your schedule doesn't allow it -- you're succeeding.  And with what you've learned on the way, you're on your way to greater success. 

You may not be at your end goal yet, but chances are, you never will be. There will always be some way in which you'll strive to be better.  Remember, pessimism is easy. We're imperfect creatures with a drive for perfection. It takes a little effort to realize that growth is difficult and see our strengths for what they are.

Groundwork for the future
There are a lot of reasons for giving ourselves props for years past year round, but taking time to celebrate your successes during the New Year is especially important.  It helps you remind you of why resolutions are worth making -- not because you need improvement but because you're worth every effort to be the best you can be.   

I'M YOUR FRIEND BEAR!

I took this test and guess who I was??? Click the link below and try it out for yourself:

http://www.care-bears.com/CareBears/html/fungames/index.html

THIS IS ME

Need a good friend? Friend Bear would love to be your best buddy bear. She's the perfect example of a friend, too. She's caring, likes to play with you and she's fun to be with. She has a friendly symbol on her tummy—two smiling flowers!

Caring Mission:	She shows how to be a great friend.
Symbol:	Her twin, smiling flowers symbolize the joy of friendship.
Personality:	Kind and friendly.
Character Quirk:	A real chatterbox, she doesn't always know when to be quiet.
Color:	Peach.
Best Friend:	Love-a-lot Bear
Relationship Challenge:	No one-she gets along with everyone!
Motto:	Have I got a friend for you—me!

I'd like to think this test was acurate for me (hehehe) Try it out yourself! :P

Hunhun

Am I such a drooling fool, that all I ever think of is you?

And am I such a ludicrous girl, to make you the center of my world

Spring time, has come and gone again

When my phone rings, I hope that’s its you..although I shouldn’t want it to…

Because you…you are my greatest flaw

And I’m so ashamed to say, I’ll do it again everyday

You…

You are my greatest flaw…

I know that I am smart, but somebody tell my heart

I want to see you then I don’t,

I jump into the feelings then I won’t,

And when I do your wasting my time…trashing what is left of my spine

Summer is playing its greatest hits

Every Friday, I hope that we meet…although I shouldn’t wish for it…

Because you…you are my greatest flaw

And I’m so ashamed to say,

I’ll do it again everyday

You…

You are my greatest flaw…

I know that I am smart, but somebody tell my heart

Didn’t I tell you so?

Didn’t you even know?

Didn’t I tell you so?

Yes I know…you’re my greatest flaw

Because you…

I know that I am smart, but somebody tell my heart

You…

You are my greatest flaw…

And I’m so ashamed to say,

I’ll do it again everyday

You…

You are my greatest flaw…

I know that I am smart, but somebody tell my heart (-D' Sound)